♛ starshine.

t h e r e m i n i s c e n t s t a r - -
v2.o -star.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

helloo.
=)
i'm here againn.

my dad's uber sweet all of a sudden.
haas.
he says i choose.
as long as its not too expensive.
and i'm thinking.
is ipod expensivee?
*blinks a little.
urhhh.
DAH.
lols.

found black cute pumps from vnc.
they still don't have the one i saw in jb.
they have the white one too though.
its glossy. so. easy to clean.
but.
white will be too glossy.
so.
black!
yeah.
=)

and it hurts my soul.
cause i can't let go.
all these walls are caving in.
i can't stop my suffering.
i hate to show that i..
lost control cause i..
keep running to the one thing that i need to walk away from.

the lyrics does not refer to my boyfriend thank you very much.
we're doing very well.
neither does it refer to any of my ex.
or anyone that anyone else thinks i like.
the answer is unexpected.
so don't ask.
unless you're prepared for it. =)

it amuses me that i can relate to this song in the term.
i was actually hesitating if i should actually type these whole chunkload here.
instead of anywhere else.
=)
but.
i figured its my blog.
so don't read if you wanna. =)

but i'm fine.
i really am.
was just reflecting.
once again 'm starting to ask if its worth it.
right now i really don't know.
i feel so torn between myself.
cause part of me says yes.
and another part says no.
i don't know which part to listen to.
and i've eventually decided that i shouldn't even be listening to myself.
cause most of the time.
its your inner self that does the most damage really.
=)
surprise surprise.
i'm beginning to speak like the old portia aiight?
i certainly yearn for that philosophical side of me.
it makes things much more comprehenable for me.
at least.
i understood more than i did.
or perhaps i tried to hard to understand.
and made sure i understood before i moved along to anything else.

whatever happens.
its God's plan.
He knows what's best for me.
there's always a reason.
He believes in me.
He believes i'll be strong enough to face whatever He pouts across my way.
and i will not disappoint Him.
i don't want to.
=)

my room smells beautiful...
its the lavender.
=)
thanks my darling.
i really love it.
i'm just not so happy cause you've got no cash cause you bought it for me.
silly..
*ruffles your hair.
=)

oh.
did i mention jpg butterfly's selling for 40 buucckaroooss?
apparently it smells uber sweet.
*pauses a lil.
and apparently.
too strawberry-ish for me.
but..but..
i like it!
-frowns.
ahh.
the joy of contemplation.
haas.
=)
ooh.
and dior's forever and ever's really nice.
and really pink.
its. limited edt?
ooh.
i think i'm gonna get my white musk too lotion for now only.
why?
cause..
i dunno.
parfum's too ex?
36 buckaroos.
can't bear to part with it yet.
so i'll settle for the lotion first.
hmm.
or should i buy the set. that comes with the shower gel too?
that's 28 buckaroos.
well.
we'll see.
i'm so so confused.
arhh.
haas.

what else?
ohoh!
i think i'll be buying the pretty star books from that expensive book shop at citylink!
one big+one small = 38.
its cheap for the standards of that shop no?
ohh.
and i saw this uber cute new precious moments thing.
its soooooooo adorable.
but its of no use.
in a sense.
so..
i guess that'll just have to be put on hold?
i have to get my priorities rightt. =)
but i'm definately gonna go get my airbrush set.
its 20 bucks.
62 piece set.
so.. its rather reasonable!
*grin.
yeahh.

blogging is good.
i've only typed for.
10 minutes.
or.
about there?
and i'm tired.
i was so wide awake when i started!
haas.
i'll stop now.

itsabittersweeteighteenthstart. =)

ineedtogetawayfromyou.needtowalkawayfromyou.getaway.walkaway.walkaway.

did the captain of the titanic cry?

;elysium.
2:49:00 AM